if i told someone that they were easily peer pressured, would they feel pressured by me to stop doing what they're doing such as drinking/smoking/being promiscuous/ditching school? it's just a funny thought... more psychological if anything. i knew it took someone to shake their head at me and said, "so easily peer pressured" and for me to be stubborn, my reaction was to of course prove that i'm not a victim of peer pressure.
i had a talk with winnie and dennis about getting "shit faced" and how unattractive it is for girls to behave in such way and i do agree with them. I can say the same for guys and I think I've taken care of more than enough drunk guys and girls who like to stick their fingers down their throats to puke at clubs to know who to get "shit-faced" with and who to totally avoid drinking around. It's either one shot for the whole night or going all out and balls to the walls for me. Personally... as farmer and lisa and maybe others have seen, when i do go all out, i at least know when to puke and would rather not show my face to others and not puke to let them see what i had for dinner or lunch lol.
i'm slowly feeling the age of people not wanting to go all crazy anymore and just casually drink... at least from being on the sideline and being at these different settings with different groups and what not. if it's going to be a mellow night and something for everyone to just warm up to and enjoy... then why not make it a drink to enjoy? "let's kick it and get fucked up"... yeah to me that's like saying let's go party in the library... it doesn't work lol.
but anyway, we'll let it lie in the situation. i do but i don't miss the party scene and it's definitely something more that happens up north more than it does down here and it makes more sense because of the group of friends i hang out with. more of the older kids down here and younger heads up there. i think this is why i'm excited to meet my boyfriend's group of friends being that they're older and i'm curious of course as to how my man gets down at parties lol not literally.
so I was going to go into movie reviews but I was laughing at this thing from E3 that my boyfriend posted on facebook and my mom told me to lower the volume. instantly my face went from =D to ._.
so of course like a blogger that I am, I would spill my feelings through this about asian parenting (or at least the parenting that i was brought up with).
I wish that I could tell my mom that she should mutter and mumble less things under her breath when she's not frustrated. However, in a previous post, I've talked about how one time she did open up to me about something and when I tried to take care of it, she ended up caving and taking things into her own hands. Ever since then we haven't talked much about how she's been lately because I feel that, as her oldest daughter and the only daughter who can speak with her without disrespecting her in any way, if she were to complain to me about something then it's might as well be a question for help. How can I help her though, if she won't simply speak with me about something that's bothering her rather than just scornfully telling me to do something or just always showing a blank expression.
(ready for a deep read into my analysis of my family?)
I think this is where my dad played most of his role as the personality of my family. If it's anyone who remembers anything from my family way back then, when my parents were still together (i'm hoping not to cry while writing this now) all my friends and even my boyfriends would either see the very happy side of my dad or the very crazy and angry side of my dad. I used to be really scared and embarass of this but now that I live with my mom, it's more of an under the table, "can you tell your brother/sister this?" and very minimal face to face contact... i talk to my mom more when i live far away from home than i do being in the same house... it's almost really sad for me to realize this and it sucks. there were so many things that my dad did that i could NOT like him for but at the same time, i missed how he would ask me about school, sports, asked me about work... (waterworks...) and just reassure me that money will never be an issue... (alt tab real quick to get my mind off of this).
but yeah so i just miss how things used to be and to hear a parent's laughter again when it's meant towards my jokes or his jokes rather than indirectly hearing a laugh through the phone while talking to a friend... or whatever. all at the same time we all know each other's stories... i know my brother's getting his MVP award, his scholar athlete award, his athlete of the month recognition, his successes with choir and his all league stuff for the city and yeah.. just amazing stuff. my sister, even though things are shaky i know she's pulling through with 4.0 GPAs at the CC and working and all that taking care of her bills and everything. my mom just working both roles as a mom and dad even if she doesnt talk to any of us, she still makes sure there's food in the fridge and things for us to cook for ourselves... i just wish we all talked more but what can i expect when it's a family where everyone minds their own business because we don't think the other has time to listen/hear/support. i'm trying to do what i can to be there for my brother and show my support. in my eyes he's still the last bit of family that everyone can try their best to be there and support the best they can. if anything, he's not as crazy involved but his focus on one sport and academics shouldn't be underminded and unseen... my sister was asb this and that as well as cheer captain and directed teams to win two different competitions throughout her years in high school. i've done my share with successes and have left my mark with the faculty and history with volleyball. yeah... it's my brother's turn to shine and i'm so proud of him. I wish my mom could just be there for him as much as my sister is trying to push him to get a job and i'm trying to make sure he's not stuck in any social/financial stresses.
by the way i will make a better thank you notice to those who've helped but even before my brother could have received his Scholar Athlete recognition, his Athlete of the Month, and MVP recognition... i want to thank John "Farmer" Huynh, Robert "Balla" Phan, and Abraham "Phantom" Nguyen for helping with their sponsors for my brother to play Volleyball this season. donating $10-$20 each is more than I asked for from each person for my brothers and you guys were way supportive. There will be more updates and newsfeed with my brother's status next year when he plays on Varsity and as the Team Captain =)
speaking of captain, now i'm curious as to lil john's brother and whether or not his little brother's the team captain for next year's Varsity team over at Westminster High =) i love having talks with others who have siblings that we can keep up with lol like how i can talk and follow with Farmer's little sister Cindy. she is AMAZING and i love talking to her. I can't think of any other close friends where I know their little siblings and have kept in touch with... most of the stories when it comes to older/younger siblings here in the 714 relate to drugs/locked up/moved and all those other type of updates... which i can see is a huge thing that they're known for but i would rather, like meeting anyone else, get to know them outside of their faults first... meaning that we all have our secrets and faults but i believe in hearing the better side of things first before hearing all the negatives.
anyway, back to Bolt
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