4 AM thoughts

A question came up in my high school English class about what a snake typically symbolizes and I learned that the answer was: temptation. That wouldn’t have been my first answer. My initial thought was: aren’t they demons?

I think I took a strong swing towards studying science more after that incident which was then followed by another incident in an English class where I was told my essay misinterpreted a story and message that the author was trying to portray. I didn’t fail the class, but I felt like I succeeded to show that I could conform. 

In college, I was in a writing class and thought to have another professor proof read my essay before submitting my final draft. Low and behold, I still didn’t get an A on that particular essay assignment. 

I’m not here to judge or criticize a particular area of study as I’m continuing to practice this form of writing that I’ve been told clearly that I’m not very good at. Albeit this is a blog and not an essay but it’s my writing and your thoughts should also be your own. 

The point of this post originally was to highlight how the events that took place in my English classes back between 2003-2005 triggered me a bit that religion still plays such a factor in how we teach in our schools - or at least just my school by selected teachers. 

I brought this up in discussion recently because someone was criticizing common core math, whereas I responded that I’m more worried about teaching beliefs and telling someone that their thoughts are incorrect based on misinterpretations or uninformed teachings of Bible stories. Further suggestions from those around me implied that these are moments I should escalate to my parents to let them know this is happening... and all I could think of was... and then what? I wasn’t upset or anything. I was just telling a story of what happened and my brain took it as, “so that’s what I have to respond with to pass this class. Cool. Next.” 

I passed to show that I can conform - not to show that I thought it was the correct way of thinking. I remember from a friend who got a perfect score on the SAT responded with, “why should I celebrate being able to pass a standardized test...?” And I resonated with that statement so much - even though my scores weren’t as honorable. 

In closing... I think it’s extremely important to learn what others find as acceptable or true to their eyes but also to realize you, too, have your own experiences that you can share and standards that you hold yourself to and it shouldn’t be clouded by other people’s thoughts and opinions. It amazes me still how people can easily judge and assess me and my choices and upbringing when I first came to them with open arms to learn. Arguably, I may have asked for it and shouldn’t be too surprised because I may have caught the person on a bad day and didn’t want any of my business. That’s fair... but maybe some day they can realize that I will continue to come and check in and share my thoughts because I’m really just here because I’m interested in theirs as well. :) no judgement. Just fascinated by how different people interpret the world around them and their upbringings and how it has affected their choices in life.